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About Me (Being Invisible)

The Ateneo de Davao University gazebo where students make their assignments and stuff, chat, reflection (if any) or just man and gal hunting.

Last month, some friends introduce me to another friend. Honestly, I feel uncomfortable when a situation like this comes up. I'm a very shy type of person. I may not shy in crowd but very shy in personal level. But I do relate well once I have made friends, making them laugh, spent a lot of money to them, share some problems only in rarity. I'm individualistic type of person, I don't know why but I do feel a lot of freedom when I'm alone, I feel powerful, I can do whatever what I want without considering others. Maybe that's a selfish kind of thinking but I like it a lot when I'm alone. By the way, I'm Victor, 21 year old college guy of Ateneo de Davao University in Mindanao Philippines. My hometown is in Polomolok, South Cotabato and I'm taking up Industrial Engineering. I'll be graduating soon next year in March. My parents are very supportive of me, they do take an effort to send me to school. Sometimes I felt guilty when I cut classes because of my boring teacher. Well, there'll be one more year to take a full responsibility of myself and I'll be out into the real world. Maybe you are wondering what's that being invisible in the title? Last year we have our retreat (the university is a religious school and hold annual retreats for our last two years stay in school). While sharing in front of our classmates our ideas, what we feel, & sentiments in one of our session, out of my mind, I bluntly said that I want to be invisible, that everybody would wouldn't give me some attention like praising or flattering me, or noticing something about me cause I feel really uncomfortable ( I don't know why). Ironically, what happened was the reverse. The next day they kept teasing me as invisible man. But its ok. I just keep smiling with a sweat in my forehead. Although I am not shy with my classmates (I love the company of them), I still don't like them to treat me that way. My classmates were one of the most beautiful thing that happened to me in my college years. They make me laugh, sober :), cry, bend rules and break boundaries and limitations. Some were bad and some good. But all of these, no one I find compatible with my way of thinking and taste. They say I'm weird sometimes, that's why I'm still all alone myself with no one to share some of my thoughts and feelings.

 

When I was a child, my mother and yaya (nanny) never forget a day to let me drink my vitamins and food supplement. I don't know why they do that because I'm healthy. I feel like a sick child when they let me take those bitter and ill taste supplements. But it work on me and before I enter the kindergarten, I'm a bloated child. I have a lot of appetite and even my hyper activeness won't work on my body. I remember when I was in my grade school, I'm always out of home to play with my childhood friends. Of course I get a lot tease from other kid. They will chorus out loud "tambok" (fat person) repeatedly, but soon all of the teasing will die down because I will act as a bully because of my huge size. Honestly, I'm not really a bully, just pretending. I can't imagine my father's belt will land on me when I got into a fight. I have a brother and a sister. A sister, Remedios, whom I share my interests because we have a lot of common in terms of what makes us happy like music sports, TV shows, movies and of course, food. She's a little chubby. She's boyish when we were young. My brother, John Paul, which I hate almost of the time because of bad attitude. He always seeks any wrong in me and tell my parents all about it (sip-sip), in which in turn, he gets the praises. Or do anything just to make me angry. That's he's role in my life, to make me angry. But my anger is not not that deep, oftentimes I ignore him and also we get all well at other times. Through him, I have discover in myself that I can't sustain anger more than an hour. My face will start to relax during that time, and poof!! like a magic, it seems that nothing had happened to whomever that makes me angry. And I'll be feeling sorry for myself for creating that feeling in my heart. And I'm glad that this apply to everyone. I don't know a person that I have angered for a long time in my life. But sometimes, i wish also that I can hold on more to my anger so that I can straight things out and have the power and will to confront that person. Well maybe that's my weakness also, being not able to confront person when they do anything bad against me.

When I graduate, I would do my best to be a good citizen in this country as well as the country would do their best for me and for other citizen. I am hoping also that I can obtain a good job, even if its not high paying, as long as I love the job and would not cause me deterioration in my everyday life as what I had seen to others. I believe that I'm a good student its just that I lack discipline and could easily mess up the good times with my studies. And that's my weakness. I could easily bite to what is soothing to my senses. But thanks God, nothing bad ever happened to me.

Next year I will be an Industrial Engineering graduate, although this is not my number 1 course, at the passing of time I have learned to love it. Maybe I can take Computer Science after I have save enough for schooling again, and this time I will not mess up my subjects as what I have done to some of my subjects at this time. I just hope that I am mature enough in the future to control my bad desires and discipline my myself like a grown up. Its so bad that I still consider myself as a kid at this age and still acts like a kid sometime, ... oftentimes.

marvel.com

My Top Ten ...

TV Series:
may include some of the ended TV series
1. The Uncanny X - Men
2. Charmed
3. Seventh Heaven
4. Ewoks
5. Will and Grace
6. Ghost Buster
7. Peter Pan (ABS CBN)
8. Magma Man
9. Exposed
10. Angel

Countries I badly want to visit

1. France
2. Switzerland
3. Greece
4. United Kingdom
5. Norway
6. Canada
7. Sweden
8. United States of America
9. Japan
10. Egypt




Comics and Cartoon Character

1. Professor X
2. Superman
3. Phoenix
4. Batman
5. Rouge
6. Storm
7. Cyclops
8. Wolverine
9. Magneto
10. Gladiator